Episode 364: I Wish It Was Birthday Today

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Ian’s birthday has us pondering important questions, including: What does the early 00s sound like? Are British people more excited out of their gourds about Christmas than North Americans? And, perhaps most importantly, am I The Guy Who Sucks? We also listen to two versions of “I Wish It Was Christmas Today”, one performed by Julian Casablancas and one performed by Cheap Trick!

The ranking clip in this episode is from “I Wish It Was Christmas Today” (which I’m just finding out right now is maybe sometimes titled “Christmas Treat“) as performed by Horatio Sans, Kermit the Frog, Fozzie Bear, Animal, and Gonzo.

Episode 363: Have Yourself a Merry Little Dance Party

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We’re about to go on our annual summer break, but we wanted to leave you with something to enjoy while we’re away! This episode, we’ve got two Christmas songs that might just be your new hot summer jam. “Make It Jingle” by Big Freedia will have you shaking a number of both literal and metaphorical things, and “Stripper Christmas Summer Weekend” by GWAR is better than that sounds, we swear!

Correction: in this episode we accidentally combined two soundtrack credits for “Make It Jingle”, the film Office Christmas Party and the game Just Dance 2018. The TV show that the recently evil search engine suggested was probably “Christmas Party”, an episode of The Office, which is still not a show, per se, so let’s say we’re all in the wrong here.

The ranking clip in this episode is Big Freedia in Beyonce’s “Formation”! That’s worded oddly because she’s not a “featured” artist for whatever reason!

Episode 362: Santa Daddy

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Ok, yes, we may be burning this title when there are certainly multiple renditions of “Santa Baby” called “Santa Daddy” that we didn’t touch in this episode. We’re just going to have to call that one “Daddy Christmas” or something. No, rather than casting actual Santa as a metaphorical daddy, this Father’s Day episode features songs about actual fathers and not-actual Santa Clauses: “Santa Claus Looks Like My Daddy” by Danny Kaye and “Daddy’s Beer” by Dave Gunning.

Thank you to Myles for requesting “Santa Claus Looks Like My Daddy”!

The ranking music in this episode is “Santa Claus is a Black Man” by Akim and Teddy Vann.

Episode 361: Hard Listening

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It’s getting to be that time of year! You know, the time of year when it feels completely wild to tell someone that you listen to a year-round winter-holiday music podcast? But don’t worry, we’ve got two listener requests to kick your holiday spirit back into high gear. “Bing Crosby Wrote Festive Christmas Songs” by Angry Snowmans is a cover that puts a right jolly twist on a punk standard. Then the upbeat “I Still Believe in Christmas” by The Fleshtones puts us in the mood for prancing, dancing, dashing, and dondering!

(Side note: if you want to know the origins of all of Angry Snowmans’ songs, someone did that legwork and posted it on reddit three years ago!)

The ranking music in this episode is “Bob Dylan Wrote Propoganda Songs” by The Minutemen.

Thank you to Kevin for these requests!

Episode 360: Aggressively Fine

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Since it’s almost Victoria Day (or as Canadians call it, “May Long Eh”), we’re talking British Christmas music again — specificially a few popular tunes that never crossed the threshold into Christmas #1s in the UK. “Christmas Lights” by Coldplay is, you know, fine. It’s fine! And “You’re Christmas to Me” by Sam Ryder? It’s FINE. WHATEVER, OK? IT’S FINE.

The ranking music in this episode is “Best Friends Squad” by Strong Bad, for reasons that should become obvious.

Episode 359: Wage Against the Machine

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To celebrate the upcoming International Workers’ Day on May 1st, we’ve got two Christmas songs about: who else? WORKERS, BABY! Well, technically, they’re also about landlords and bosses, but only in the way that Taken is about the guys who kidnapped that lady from Lost. Jeez, has she tried being in something called Exactly Where She’s Supposed To Be? Anyway: we listened to “Christmas Eve In the East Side” by Aunt Molly Jackson, followed by “National Living Rage” by… let’s go with Siobhain McDonagh and friends for now.

The ranking music in this episode is “No Christmas in Kentucky” by Phil Ochs.

Episode 358: I Have a Little Weed Day

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Our annual 4/20 episode is back, and this year? Good songs only!!! You may be surprised to hear that we were still able to find two good weed-themed winter holiday songs, but indeed: “High on Hanukkah” by Micah E. Wood (featuring Ari Pluznik and Seth Kibel) is an enjoyable ode to holiday paranoia, and “Kushmas” by Smino is… well, surely it’s about something, but that’s sort of beside the point.

The ranking music in this episode is “Sleigh”, also by Smino (featuring Monte Booker and Masego)!

Episode 357: Holidays Doth Rule

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As per tradition (at least from days of yore when we did episodes weekly), we’re using the week of Easter to add some more traditional Christmas music to our list. And it just so happens that both of this episode’s songs are from the same album, 2012’s Holidays Rule! Both songs were also composed by guys named Henry who were better known for other things, which I guess is also kind of a fun coincidence? Calexico’s take on King Henry VIII’s “Green Grows the Holly” is a breath of fresh air, but Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day” as performed by The Civil Wars is just kinda… air.

This week’s ranking music is “The Holly and the Ivy” performed by Los Campesinos!

Episode 356: Lots in Translation

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By request, we’re tackling two holiday songs that expand the number of languages and dialects represented in our list. “Jingle Bells” as performed by Béla Fleck and the Flecktones featuring Alash marks the first appearance of Tuvan, and also, of Tuvan throat-singing! And, I don’t know, maybe like the thirtieth post-modern banjo performance? And while we’ve had a good amount of French under our belts and in our ears already, “23 Décembre” by Beau Dommage is our first in the Québécois working-class dialect of Joual. Er, probably? Listen, we got really sidetracked in the middle of this one.

The ranking music in this episode is “Fa La La” by Bündock.

Thank you to merikus for these requests!

Episode 355: Ten Lords a Leap Year

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To celebrate the Leap Year, we’re leaping into two versions of The 12 Days of Christmas! Kind of!!! Neither “12 Days of Christmas” by Gucci Mane or “The Twelve Days of Christmas” by The Popguns use the traditional lyrics or structure of the song, but hey, we can consider that an improvement.

The ranking music in this episode is “8 Days of Christmas” by Destiny’s Child.